Sunday, July 28, 2013

My Image on Body

B&W Photo: 12 years old
Color Photo: Photo Credit Pinky Photography

From the very beginning as a little girl, women can all relate that we sometimes didn’t feel right in our skin. As a young girl, I was forced to were stupid dresses and have my hair a certain way. But when looking at my brothers, they slapped some jeans on and went on their way. I was told how cute I looked, and how cute my dress was. I would blush thinking to myself, “My brothers don’t get talked to this way.” I don’t think I was thinking feminist thoughts, I was thinking I was no different than my brothers. It wasn’t until recently which I read an article posted by a friend of mine on FaceBook, talking about how we influence little girls when we talk to them. Then it hit me, girls are molded to be something before they can even decide who they are.

As a model, I have always been made aware of my body image whether I liked it or not. When I first started modeling at the age of 12, I went to ‘Dorothy Shreve, Modeling and Talent Agency and School’, based out of Palm Springs. Dorothy was a great teacher; she not only taught the 101 in modeling, but also the ways to conduct yourself as an intelligent young woman. I was told that I never sit up straight, and that my posture was that of an annoyed teenage boy. I didn’t know how to use a place setting at a dinner table; she told me how important it was. She had also mentioned to me to pay attention in school, I just wanted to model. How I finally understand her now…

Skinny, awkward, and gangly, I still hated myself growing up. I wanted to hide in my shell when I was out in public or at school. I hated hearing how skinny I was and that I always should eat something. As a teenager, I ate everything. Anything, if it was moving I ate it. I can remember one year a girl saying to me, “Evina, your actually gaining weight, your legs actually are kinda jiggling. Or it could be the loose skin on your bones.” I could remember thinking to myself, “Why is my body important? I just want to have friends who don’t judge me.” I went on with my school days wondering, ‘why me?’

Now I know, ‘Why Me?”. I know that I was brought here through my struggle with my weight, both disorders and not, that I am here to bring up a topic every woman wants to debate or conquer. Through my years, I have learned to love myself no matter how weird I look. I have never really put someone in a corner and mirrored their weight in their face as a defining moment. I want to tell women out there that you don’t have to be blonde, skinny, black, curvy, or have a million operations (exaggerating) to feel pretty and sexy. You can be anything as long as you set your mind to it.

As a woman, I have felt anger every time someone has pointed out my thin frame and discredit their own body because they don’t look like me. Body image is our own inside job, our own insecurity; it belongs to you, not someone else. Now being in the fitness industry, the first thing I tell the women I work with is, “Your goal is not to look like me, and it’s to look and feel like a better you.” When I talk to women, I want to empower them… I don’t want them to feel less than, women are not. I have crossed many women who have lifted me up and threw me down, and the ones who have lifted me up are the ones who I keep.      

            With my experience now, I have learned that beauty is not souly dependent on what is on the outside of us, nor is it our body type, the diets we eat, or how we do our makeup, those are just accessories. Since I have started going back to school to finish my B.A., I have never felt this sexy and powerful in my life. I encourage women everywhere, to crack open a few books once and a while, take a class or two and take something you would never take in your life. Go to a library and sit quietly while picking up a book you have never read before. Stop reading ‘Fifty Shades of Grey” and pretending it’s you and go out and live a little. Call your girlfriends up and gossip… its ok we all do it. Take a walk, a hike, a bicycle ride, take a chance.

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